Rodney Block and a Cold Weather Survey for The Dispatched!

1. Birds migrate, bears hibernate, how do you make it through the cold winter months?
A. Inebriated mumbling
B. Rapid alternation between hope and despair.
C. Already numb with ironic detatchment.

2. In our whacky post-modern age, how do you attempt authenticity?
A. Inebriated stumbling
B. Unabashed nostalgia mining
C. Feigned ignorance
D. Corrosive unacceptability
E. Hypocritical political action
F. Fuck all that, I proudly wade through the spectacular hyper-real simulacra until I come out genuine on the other side.

3. Do you encounter your own existence as gratuitous?
A. PBR
B. Yeungling
C. Meth
D. Television

4. How does your crew roll?
A. Malicious imprecations directed at "The Other"
B. Rampant internecine conflict
C. Gratuitous incestual fornication
D. Ingulgence of the thanatos drive
E. Lil o' this, Lil o' that.

5. How would you like to respond to this survey?
A. "I'm not sure if I like this or not?"
B. "My my, Rodney, aren't you just trying so hard to out-do us in the intellectual condescension department!"
C. "Just mark me down for whatever maintains the illusion that I am "in" on the "joke"."
D. "Hey Rodney! Your survey is dumb and you're a nauseating jack-ass. Fuck off!"